Hungry Men.

INTERESTING FACT:

Did you know women get free food 800% more times than men? Women are KILLING IT in this area.

Scientists say a big reason for this comes from women knowing how to say these words in this exact order: "Oh, I'm not really hungry. I'll just have a bite of yours." That gets them at least half a cheeseburger and definitely an entire basket of fries every time. 

In a privately-funded study I just made up, researchers attempted to teach men how to say that very phrase but the dumb men could not get the words to come out of their mouths. According to one researcher, "Their manhood would not allow it, especially in the presence of other men."

In each case, the subjects just sat in silence and quickly pulled out their wallets to each pay for their own food, at which point female researchers instinctually intervened and consumed said food.