We Should Be Ashamed

I'm tired of people getting shamed for "shaming." Because some people just need to be shamed. It's how society puts in check all the assholes and douchenozzles.

If we keep trying to make everything all rosy and Pollyana and let everyone do whatever they want willly-nilly – meanwhile reprimanding those calling people out on their asshole-ness or douchenozzle-dom – it's going to get to a point where we'll just be like:

"Hey, you, quit murder-shaming him! You have no right to comment on his murdering! He should be allowed to murder all he wants! You don't get to control him, you murder-shamer!"

So, if you see someone texting in a movie, shame them.

If you see someone not wiping their sweat off gym equipment, shame them.

If you see someone clip their toenails in the office, shame them.

If you see someone walk really, really slow across the crosswalk instead of quickstepping because they're staring down at their phone, and you're trying to turn, shame them.

If you see someone wearing yoga pants and flip-flops to a formal ceremony, shame them.

If you see someone having sex in the Arts & Crafts aisle at Walmart, shame them.

If you see someone hula-hooping on a unicycle outside of a circus, shame them.

If you see someone taking a selfie at a funeral, shame them.

If you see parents letting their kids run wild and scream through a restaurant while others are just trying to have a nice, pleasant dinner, shame them. Wait, no. Trip the kids first. Then shame the parents.

If you see Donald Trump, shame him.

If you see someone talking during a comedy show, shame them.

If you're a person who shames people who shame others for being just outright jerks, shame on you.