Note To Next President

Dear Bernie Sanders. Or Hilary Clinton. Or Jeb Bush. Or Marco Rubio. Or Donald Trump (Please, God, don't make it be Donald Trump). Or Whomever. It doesn't matter...

Dear Puppet:

If you want something to get done or passed, just do the opposite of what that is. Because chances are everyone else will gang up to push for the other way, and then you'll ultimately get your way. Politics are less about issues, more about posturing. And reverse psychology is a better strategy than reason. The same way it works on children. After all, that's what most politicians are anyways, are they not?

So be like George Costanza when he does the opposite. You'll get the girl. You'll get the job. You'll get the congressional votes from all those who hate your stinking guts.

Take Refuge

During the Vietnam war, my parents came over to America as refugees along with tens of thousands of other displaced, scared and frightened Vietnamese people with no place to call home anymore.

And just like the Syrians currently fleeing from their civil war-torn country, they too were confronted with a lot of resistance and anger. Many were not accepted and treated like stray dogs. Even as a child years after the war was over, I would myself hear, "Gook! Go back to your country! We don't want you here!" And that was from fully-grown adults.

But ultimately, once my parents and all their fellow Vietnamese refugees settled in and became a part of the neighborhoods, communities and country, what was the result of it all?

40 years later, everyone now fucking loves the shit out of pho.

See? Some good did come out of it. So don't be a dick. Open your minds and your hearts. And, if anything, you'll get to eat well years from now.